Breaking the Cycle: How Laura Found Healing Through Helping Others
Self Healing Communities Meeting, Lompoc, September 2025
For much of her life, Laura Gholson carried the burden of generational trauma. She grew up in an environment surrounded by addiction, as both her grandmother and father struggled with alcoholism. Eventually, she too became trapped in the same cycle. It took her decades to begin the healing process. However, when her daughter's addiction left four young children in crisis, Laura had to summon every ounce of strength she had to prevent her family from falling apart.
"I had to push my own child away to protect her children," Laura said quietly. "That's not natural as a mother. I miss my daughter a lot."
When Laura stepped in to raise her four grandchildren, she entered one of the hardest chapters of her life. Addiction had already left deep emotional scars on the family, and her oldest grandchild lost his father to an overdose. "You don't think you'll be parenting again at this age," she said. "It's hard. But I couldn't live with the alternative of what would have happened if I didn't step in."
At first, Laura felt completely alone. Few people could understand what it was like to balance grief, anger, and responsibility for a new generation while still healing from her own past. But that changed when she stumbled upon a Self-Healing Communities (SHC) meeting in her hometown of Lompoc, California.
A friend had invited her to a community gathering led by SHC's Project Manager, Raymond Segovia Jr., where residents were exploring new ways to strengthen the community through connection and healing. Laura wasn't sure what to expect, but she left that first meeting with a sense of hope she hadn't felt in years.
"It was like, boom, all of a sudden we were all hooked up and doing stuff," she said with a laugh. "I've always wanted to help people. I've done a lot of things I'm not proud of, but if I can turn that around into something positive, then I'm helping others and healing myself at the same time."
That spark led Laura to start a grandparents raising grandchildren local peer-support group that has become a lifeline for many families in the area. Through SHC's encouragement and resources, she began creating a safe space where grandparents could share their struggles, exchange advice, and feel understood.
Isolation, Laura said, is the hardest part. "You feel like nobody gets it. Even family members sometimes criticize you for stepping in. Some grandparents lose contact with their own children because of it."
Her group meets casually; just peers sitting together, talking through challenges and sharing tools that have helped them cope. Laura recalls one grandmother who called her in tears over an argument with her teenage granddaughter. "I told her, 'It's okay. Take a walk, calm down. If you can't talk to anyone, write your feelings down and tear up the paper.' It helps get it out of your chest and off your mind."
Through SHC's network, Laura has connected members to resources for therapy, childcare, and even financial assistance. Many grandparents, she explained, don't realize they qualify for state support programs because they aren't the children's legal parents. "They're using their retirement money to raise these kids," she said. "Finding out they can get help is a huge relief."
Beyond the resources, though, it's the relationships that have changed her most. "They're extremely supportive," Laura said of the SHC team. "They help me get the word out, cheer me on, and we all have the same heart for this community."
Today, Laura feels stronger and more at peace than ever before. Her grandchildren are thriving, her home is full of laughter and second chances, and she's helping others rewrite their stories just as she rewrote hers.
"I spent a lot of my life hurt and angry, but now I want to be the opposite," she said. "Hurt people hurt people—but healed people heal people."
She knows the journey isn't quick. "It takes a long time to heal a person," she said, "and it takes a long time to heal a community. But I'm proud to be part of it.
Sharing her advice for other grandparents or community members who see a need and want to act, she said, "Start somewhere. Reach out. Don't feel alone. There are others out there just like you."
Laura's story is proof that when people find connection, compassion, and the courage to act, they not only heal themselves but also help heal their communities.